The world recently lost one of it's greatest comedians with the death of Robin Williams. This funnyman has been entertaining people and making folks laugh for years, with different characters and sketches, as well as his interviews and general demeanor. However, he was holding something in, as we now know. Behind the smiles, laughter, jokes and good times sat a man who was without hope. He is quoted saying "I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone, it's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone." There is a lot of truth in that statement. While the nation, and maybe even the world, stops to look back on this man's life, we are quick to jump to the happy memories and very slow to think about the problem that led up to him taking his own life. Now, I didn't know the man personally, so I'm not gonna talk like I did. However, from what I've gathered, I can say that the things he kept inside did not leave him as a special case.
I was fortunate enough to grow up in a good home. Both of my parents are Godly people, and have raised myself and my siblings very well and were protective. This being said, I wasn't exactly the problem child growing up and was what most people would describe as under a rock for the first part of my life. Well, when I got to high school, I decided to start taking my friendships seriously. By that, I mean actually taking the time to see how my friends are doing and what's going on rather than just living with the "I'm good. Everything's dandy" answer that we all spit out as soon as the words "how are you?" escape someone's lips. This change brought about quite the revelation. You see, as soon as I started investing the time into my friendships to see what was going on with the people around me, I quickly realized how much hurt and pain is really in the world of an average American teenager. Poor relationships with parents, fights, abuse, depression, and just built up frustration, along with all sorts of other struggles came up in different conversations with various people. And there seemed to be one overlying factor: the idea that pain can't show. Sure, if you're having a bad day it's one thing to go take it out on anybody and everybody you come in contact with, but our society seems to be one that wants everything to be perfect so badly that we sweep the bad stuff under the rug. I had someone tell me once that they had deleted a post on Facebook because it was too sad. That Facebook was only for the happy stuff. While daily complaining and sob stories get old really fast, it's not a bad thing to let others know that, "hey, this and this just happened. I'm kinda having a bad day." That lets those of us who care enough to read it know what's going on, and ask for details if we would like them. I have found that nine times out of ten what people really need is just somebody who will sit and listen to them. To go to someone and ask, "hey, I saw this happened, how are you doing?" means a lot more to most people than we think. The world we live in is so fast paced that to take the time to sit down and chat with somebody (face to face, not texting) is pretty much a lost art. Even over technology, conversation deeper than small talk seem to be getting more rare.
Now, about the Robin Williams bit I started with. But here's where it all comes around: people wind up feeling alone because no one takes the time to actually take a genuine interest in their lives. They feel alone because no one lets them know that they care about them. People get depressed because they try to carry all of this life's problems by themselves. People give up hope because they go too long with these feelings. And once their hope is gone, it's hard to get back.
So, if you are willing, invest in someone. It might make you uncomfortable, but that's ok. Take the time to make someone feel appreciated, and see where it takes you. You just might save someone's life.
~ES
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